The Narrow Path Between Desires

You and me, babe… I think we're doing our very best to walk along that narrow path between our desires… the desire to be together… the desire to not hurt those around us… the desire to hold each other… the desire to be in each other's lives… the desire to touch each other… the desire to do things right…

It's wickedly complicated. Billions of potential branches, the vast majority of which lead to failure, to a life lived without the other, not even in each other's lives anymore. I don't know how much of the fact that we haven't hit a dead end yet is due to strategy, or to dumb luck, or even to the power of love guiding our way… But, however we've managed, we still have an infinite variety of branches ahead of us, an endless stream of bifurcations, each one with the potential to bring us closer together… or to spin us forever apart.

It can be amazing. It can feel agonizingly slow and frustrating. Especially now that I think you and I both know that the instant one of us lets our guard down, our lips will find each other. Without hesitation.

Our hearts… well, our hearts already found each other… ages ago.

But it's started to occur to me, looking down that narrow path…

There are still so many branches. There are still dangers lurking around every bend. But fewer and fewer of our choices lead to dead ends. We've been building our relationship for these past few years, solidifying our connection, letting our hearts grow closer and closer and closer, while mostly playing only the cards that we've been dealt. And each time the bond between us grows, we close off more and more of those dark paths…

I'm not quite so optimistic that I imagine we've reached the point where we've closed them all off yet. There're still plenty of opportunities to misstep. But I see fewer and fewer of them with each passing day. I think we've very nearly reached the point where it seems likely that we will be in each other's lives, in some capacity, forever, no matter what happens.

I think you know what my heart wants. I suspect I know what yours does. And I know sometimes it feels so incredibly difficult… so, so… impossible. But I know we can do it, my love. I have faith in us. I have faith in love. How many dead ends have we already bypassed? How many dark futures have we already successfully avoided?

Oh, it hurts sometimes. Oh, it can feel so insurmountable. I feel like I spend most of my life these days just missing you. But we have excelled at blazing this trail so far, my love. We're good at it. With your insanely sharp wit and my infinite patience… we will find that path, the one that leads between all of our other desires and straight to the one desire: a life together, lived in love. We will. I have faith in us. I have faith in love. I have faith in us.

So, take my (metaphorical) hand, my dearest love. And let's erase those dead ends from the map. Let's shine the light of our love down those dark paths, blasting them from existence. Let's blaze that trail. Let's do it. So that one day, and soon, you can take my actual hand. My real, very warm, actual hand.

You with me? Yeah? Thought so.

Let's go, babe. You and me? We got this. 🙌

Yours.